Plagues and Wonders

Mandatory listening for today, Keb Mo’s 'God Trying To Get Your Attention'

Today is Easter Sunday, it hits right in the middle of Passover just as it did thousands of years ago. This is not a religious blog and I’m not going to go all holy on you, but I do believe the spiritual has as much to do with health as doctors and drugs. We are told by the religious scholars to link the morals of these remarkable accounts to our everyday lives and it will make us healthier people. God knows we have put our faith in doctors and prayed they can perform miracles.

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After breaking out the mower for the first time this year what I’m looking for is some divine intervention into the whole landscaping business. I liken the purveyors of the suburban lawn to the Pharaohs. They have enslaved us all to the pursuit of the green. They are shysters and should be dealt with accordingly. In Kentucky they even try to convince us that green is blue. They pit neighbor against neighbor promoting the green with envy syndrome just because the guy next door can achieve carpet-like quality while yours is a dandelion catastrophe. You can eat dandelions and make wine from dandelions, can you do that with your basic turf grass?

We are shamed into uniformity, harassed if our lawn does not meet the standards set forth by the solicitors of lushness. They sell us fertilizers to sweeten the soil and then chemicals to control the bugs and critters that feast on what grows in such fertile earth. The run-off from all this pollutes the environment and causes us to plow more green in to the cleanup.

Who came up with the idea for the lawn? A plague of biblical proportion should be waged on them and their heirs. I know the curb appeal police would come after me but I’m thinking of going completely desert on them. I want to rock my whole lawn like they do in Arizona. Why is it acceptable there and not here? No mowing ever again, ahhh, enjoying Saturdays and Sundays without cranking the bladed noisemaker.

Or, is all this just the ranting of a guy who forgot how tough it is to mow a 60º hill?

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Back to the acts of wonder, I wrote this following the pronouncement of a miracle in NY when Scully turned a jetliner into a seaplane. Are we sure it was a goose that caused this? Hmmm, I wonder. It's a tent revival number so raise your hands and clap along!

A Miracle To See
By Bob Masterson © Old Paint Music 2009

We were taking off right over the city
We were flying off to a distant land, land, land
We were climbing up right over the city
But that bird, that bird had other plans

We’re gonna to skip this thing right off of the river
We’re gonna slide this thing right over the sea, sea, sea
We’re gonna land this plane on the Hudson River
Walk across the water for all the world to see

Was that the dove of peace sucked into our engines?
Was the dove of peace sacrificed for me, me, me?
Did the dove of peace bring me to the water,
Whoa-oh-oh, a miracle to see?

We’re gonna to skip this thing right off of the river
We’re gonna slide this thing right over the sea, sea, sea
We’re gonna land this plane on the Hudson River
Walk across the water, a miracle to see!

Can there be a higher purpose?
Or have we only skimmed across the sea, sea, sea?
We have only skimmed the surface
Whoa-oh-oh, of possibility

We’re gonna to skip this thing right off of the river
We’re gonna slide this thing right over the sea, sea, sea
We’re gonna land this plane on the Hudson River
Walk across the water, a miracle to see!

We were taking off right over the city
We were flying off to a distant land, land, land
We were climbing up right over the city
But the Lord, the Lord had other plans!

We’re gonna to skip this thing right off of the river
We’re gonna slide this thing right over the sea, sea, sea
We’re gonna land this plane on the Hudson River
Walk across the water, a miracle to see!
Walk across the water, it’s a miracle to see!
Walk across the water, it’s a miracle to see!


Happy Easter and Happy Passover!